Weapons (2025)

Horror

Rated 18

Spoiler Free

Writer/Director Zach Cregger's Barbarian people (and by people, I mean people in the horror community on X) went a bit jizzy for. It almost made me like it, but I didn’t. Despite that, I’m a horror slut and a very forgiving person; plus Weapons had a great trailer, all creepy and sinister, promising decent mystery. I was hoping for something in the ilk of The Empty Man.

Oozing ominous from the off, Julia Garner’s slightly troubled teacher Justine finds herself teaching a class of one, after all the little beggars got up and wandered into the night at exactly the same time except for Alex (Cary Christopher). I say “teaching”, she isn’t teaching anybody as she’s put on gardening vodka leave when all the parents of said AWOL pre-teens decide she must be at fault and she’s scapegoated and stalked.

The kids aren't alright

What happened to the rugrat runaways? Who knows- that’s the fun of the film! You do, obviously, find out, but it’s all about the journey innit. The mystery element is alluring and Justine’s paranoia palpable. It’s all very weird, and while it builds quite slowly, I wasn’t bothered. My confidence that shit would kick off was rewarded. Patience is not something I often exercise, and so a poor barometer of how much patience pays off for me, but I’m glad I stuck with Weapons.

The tingles continue as the story unfolds from different perspectives and when Weapons kicks into gear its coda is kosher.

Bedsit it?

Dark, threatening and tantalising, then somewhat unhinged, I really enjoyed Weapons. It’s accessible, too. A crossover horror for more than just the nutters. A very solid 7/10

Check out these horror greats and not so great, spoiler free reviews!...

APOSTLE
WITCHFINDER GENERAL
BRING HER BACK
HOUSE OF 1000 CORPSES
THE EXORCIST