Conclave (2024)
Drama/Catholics Rated 12 Spoiler Free I could have written four jokes on Conclave’s age certification alone. “Rated 12, but if you look about 12 that’s fine too”. I was raised a Catholic, my family mostly remain Catholic. I like the Catholics, I just don’t believe in God, or letting a prolific history of sexual abuse fly by without a cheap joke or seven. By pure happenstance I watched Conclave on a Friday, while making a fish pie. Because God loves fishy finger Fridays and works in mysterious ways, which is why he also gave me the ability to understand I can do better than these jokes and yet the ability to just accept, fuck it I'm making them anyway. It’s all your fault, God. Don’t you go giving me free will then tell me to kill fish in time for Friday or you’ll be upset. Ralph Fiennes! Stanley Tucci! John Lithgow! All were presumably subject to forensic scrutiny before being cast because it would be a field day if one of those beloved and hugely talented actors had a #MeToo exp...
